the knowledge that you arent very smart...

maybe im just meant to be alone. i dont know but i have never been good at the whole relationship thing. IM LONELY. but im also not very patient and heaven knows he was just trying figure out what he wanted. i do not take being let down very well. so i got the hell out of dodge. i frequently lie to myself though. i pretend he was the problem but its me. hi. im the problem its me.

chronic stomach pains

Hi my chronic stomach pains are here to stay, I fear. It could possibly be stress & anxiety-caused, which I think it may be, because I just got home from the worst trip ever, or it could be God slapping me upside the head because I forgot him AGAIN. Living with a disability is hard. Forget all the pain of receiving my disability, the day to day LIFE of a disabled person is--for lack of a better word--SHIT.

jokes! no food allergies!

i can gladly announce that i have ZERO food allergies! just dogs and a specific weed that i dont remember ever. i eat whatever the hell i want.

when someone you love changes

 or they don't. only you know when their desire to change, growth, or lack thereof, is a deal breaker for you. my current frustration is that my lover drinks too much. he has the beer belly and everything, but at the same time, so do i, AND I DON'T DRINK. im 4,000% positive that he has certain things he wishes i would be better about that im just not.